Tonight, a group had gathered. There was Mateo, a gay elder who’d survived the AIDS years and still bore the lesions of loss on his memory. There was Jun, a nonbinary librarian who brought homemade kimchi and a quiet rage against the city’s housing policies. There was Miss Candace, a seventy-two-year-old trans woman who had been a ballroom legend in the ‘80s and now used a walker with tennis balls on the feet, which she’d bedazzled herself.
| Myth | Fact | |------|------| | “Being trans is a mental illness.” | Gender identity variation is not a disorder. Gender dysphoria is a diagnosis to enable care, like “pregnancy” in ICD. The WHO removed “transsexualism” from mental disorders in 2019. | | “Kids are too young to know.” | Children understand gender by age 3–4. Social transition is reversible. Puberty blockers are safe, reversible, and give time to decide. | | “Trans women are a threat in bathrooms.” | No evidence. Trans people are more likely to be assaulted in bathrooms than to assault anyone. Studies show nondiscrimination laws don’t increase safety incidents. | | “Most trans people detransition.” | Rates of regret for gender-affirming surgery (~1%) are lower than for knee surgery or having children. Detransition often happens due to family rejection or lack of money, not because identity changed. | | “Non-binary isn’t real.” | Non-binary identities exist across cultures and history. Brain studies show some people’s sense of self doesn’t align with binary categories. | | “Trans people are just gay people in denial.” | No. Sexual orientation and gender identity are different. Some trans people are gay (e.g., trans man who loves men), some are straight, some bi, etc. | shemale ass worship best
Perhaps the most significant export of trans and queer culture is the . Originating in Harlem in the 1960s (documented in the film Paris is Burning ), Ballroom was a safe haven for Black and Latinx trans women and gay men who were excluded from white gay bars. Categories like "Realness" (the ability to pass as cisgender/straight in daily life) and "Voguing" (a dance style mimicking fashion models) were pioneered by trans women. These elements now dominate pop music videos and global dance competitions. Tonight, a group had gathered
At the end, Kai stepped forward and said it, loud enough for the rain to carry: “Her name was Dominique. She loved butterflies, and purple, and she taught me that family isn’t blood. It’s thread. You stitch it yourself, one person at a time.” There was Miss Candace, a seventy-two-year-old trans woman
According to the Human Rights Campaign, at least 50% of transgender individuals have experienced some form of intimate partner violence. Tragically, the majority of fatal violence against trans people targets . In LGBTQ culture, the annual Transgender Day of Remembrance (November 20) is a somber, necessary ritual that the broader gay community is only beginning to fully observe.